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I remember once seeing an amusing cartoon. It was called “A delightful bit of news,” and represented five or six feminine heads, all looking one way, and all with their mouths open. The first head was small, and the mouth proportioned to the rest of the features; the next was rather larger, with a much wider mouth; the third was larger still, and so on. This picture portrayed in a capital way what often happens, especially in small towns or villages, when some trifling incident in passing from mouth to mouth is magnified by the gossips and tattlers till it attains the proportions of quite an important event; and thus, to quote a homely proverb, a mountain is made out of a molehill.
How greatly a man may be wronged, what incalculable injury may be done him, if some trifling fault he has committed is magnified by the tongue of scandal-mongers, and spread abroad by evil-speakers who wish him ill. And yet these people will not, for the most part, allow that they are much to blame. They say with the Pharisee in the Temple: “O God, I give Thee thanks that I am not as the rest of men, “ like this or that person! They allege all kinds of excuses for their conduct, and it may be well for you to hear what some of these excuses are.
Some persons say: “We had not the least intention of injuring our neighbor’s reputation by what we said.” But what good does that do him? It injures him all the same; it is detrimental to his good name. If a man were to plunge a knife into a fellow-creature’s heart, what would it avail to protest loudly at the trial that the murderer had no intention of inflicting the slightest wound!
Others seek to excuse themselves by asserting that they were not the first to discover these failings, but mentioned them only because they had heard of them from others. But do such persons not know what the Holy Ghost says in the Scriptures: “Hast thou heard a word against thy neighbor? Let it die within thee.” And yet they imagine there is no great harm in repeating the evil they have heard about any one to those who hitherto were ignorant of it! How much evil is told which is absolutely untrue, and is merely the product of a malicious imagination! He who repeats such things is guilty of a twofold sin: in the first place, because he believed that which was utterly without foundation; in the second place, because he told it to some one who as yet did not know it.
Another will say: “These faults of my neighbor are no secret; for the person to whom I refer is notorious for his vices, and has a very bad reputation.” But even if the faults which are talked about are widely known, what is the use of repeating them? And if any one is unfortunate enough to be in bad repute, and has already lost his character, why take pleasure in talking about it? Those who act thus remind one of barbarians, who, not content with killing their victim, take a diabolical delight in stabbing and mutilating his lifeless body.
It may further be urged that the faults of one’s neighbor do really exist. Are you perfectly certain of this? Does not that which appears to be simple truth often turn out to be a shameful slander? What could have seemed to be more clearly substantiated than the adultery of which the chaste Susanna was accused by the two dissolute old men? Yet it was the vilest calumny imaginable.
“But these and those faults are positively true.” Granted that they are true! Let us ask ourselves whether we would like our own faults, however widely known, to be made the topic of conversation. Most assuredly we would not. Therefore you ought not to do to another what you would not like if it were done to yourself. Not only does Our Lord forbid us to act in this manner, but also natural politeness, and even our own reason, if unbiassed by prejudice. Therefore observe the golden rule. If our neighbor’s faults, about which we talk, really do exist, are we ourselves faultless? Who would dare adopt the words of the Pharisee, and say: “O God, I give Thee thanks that I am not as the rest of men”? What man is there under the sun so pure and blameless that his conscience has nothing of which to accuse him? If there is such a one let him come forward and claim the privilege of speaking evil of his neighbor. “He that is without sin among you,” the Saviour exhorts us, “let him first cast a stone at her,” his neighbor.
Others again are found to say: “We have mentioned the unfortunate occurrence to only one or two persons whom we can entirely trust, and we have enjoined strict silence upon them.” Those who talk after this fashion have perhaps lived for forty, fifty, or sixty years, and yet have never learned that out of one hundred individuals, women more especially, perhaps two are to be found who can keep a secret! If other persons are not to talk, why talk yourself? If others are to be silent, would not the best and most sensible plan be to keep silence yourself?
I will tell you an anecdote about Prince Eugene, the great Austrian general. An ambitious officer wearied him with incessant requests that he tell him the plan of the forthcoming campaign. For some time the Prince only smiled at the repeated questions but at last he seemed to have made up his mind to break the silence. With a mysterious air he led his tormentor into a room apart, and whispered into his ear: “My good sir, you want to know my plan for the next campaign?” “I should like nothing better in all the world!” was the eager reply. “But first I must ask you a question,” rejoined the Prince—“can you hold your tongue?” “I can be as silent as the grave!” “That is just as it should be, I am delighted to hear it! Now listen to me: I also can hold my tongue, and therefore I prefer to keep my secret to myself!”
In conclusion, we will listen to those who say: “You are quite right; I am aware that I ought not to talk about my • neighbor’s faults. But though I determine never to do so, I fall into the same fault over and over again.” This is not an idle excuse, but the candid confession of a humble heart. Make it your own, my dear child. However often you fail never grow weary of renewing your resolution not to utter one single uncharitable word about your neighbor. And if sometimes you do speak unkindly, do not excuse yourself by saying there is no great harm in it, but rather remember the lines:
The wise man will seek his own faults to amend;
The fool to his neighbor’s alone will attend.